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I wonder if Job was plagued by the Varicella-Zoster virus. For those of you who have suffered with shingles, you know exactly what I’m talking about. I first heard about the disease through the cases experienced by older relatives who have since passed the baton on to me. Never in my wildest dreams did I realize the severity of the illness with the silly minimalistic-sounding name.

The Varicella-Zoster virus is the cause of our very common childhood disease that seems more than a nuisance than anything: chicken pox. Once stricken, we are never free from the virus which lays dormant in the roots of our nerves, waiting for the ‘opportune time’ to strike once more, usually in older adults who suffer from weakened immune systems or who have experienced periods of stress. Ahem…

A week ago I experienced a drenching, sickening sweat, nerve pain behind my eye and in my teeth. Two days later the characteristic lesions began to develop on the right side of my face and scalp accompanied by an intense throbbing pain. I pulled up Web MD with a hunch I had and sure enough, it was confirmed by the nurse practitioner the following morning.

In her less than tactful bedside manner, I was told I had come down with the worse case scenario, the virus having traveled the length of the ocular nerve that travels to the eye. I could lose my vision. The recovery process would be long and consist of two stages. I would be contagious until the lesions scabbed over completely, meaning that I could spread chicken pox to all those who have not had the illness. This would take approximately three weeks. Part two would take much longer, for the scabbing does not mean healing, just a lack of contagion. It would take anywhere from 3 months to a year to never for the pain to go away. Do you think I needed to hear that right then? So I was sent on my way, stat, to whatever ophthalmologist would have me on the 4th of July weekend, with a boatload of prescriptions “that are only the best we can do, after all, this is a virus.” Stupid woman.

The ophthalmologist found no lesions in the eye and instructed me as to what to look for in determining the warning signs of eye complications.

Week one is now behind me, one filled with intense pain, my right eye swollen shut, ugly red lesions marring my appearance, sleepless nights spent on the old brown sofa with Skylar by my side (What would we do without the love of a dog?), days spent mostly in a stupor caused by the nerve-blocker prescribed in the hopes of preventing long-term damage. I refused the narcotic for pain in fear of going down a path of addiction enjoyed by my favorite eccentric television doc. I haven’t been able to read until yesterday. Just picking up the Scriptures has been overwhelming. I scribble daily in the journal bought especially for this time by my team leader. Bless you, and bless you, and bless you. I’ll make an attempt at the podcast later today; Abba please…

This is so hard to write. I’m finding myself having to go back to correct every other word. But in order to process this time properly, I’ve got to get this out, for my adversary is tormenting not only my body but my mind.

The hardest thing about this time is the isolation. Family refuses to see me, choosing to disbelieve the information that the medical community provides. In a way, I can’t blame them. My grandson, whom I haven’t seen since Mother’s Day, is exiled from my arms. I am missing so much of his rapid growing up. (Insert Punk Monk’s favorite expletive here.) My beloved people of Renovatus are an arm’s length too far away. I just recently shared with a friend that I’m fine as long as I can be with my people. Isolation is the war zone.

It’s interesting to see how human nature handles the suffering of another. Bottom line, we fear it for ourselves, so we avoid it, poo-poo it. A well-wisher said she was sorry but at least it wasn’t cancer. It isn’t cancer, but it is my suffering for the present time. It is very real to God and very real to me. Whatever the affliction, be it physical, emotional, spiritual, it doesn’t have to be a stage four malignancy to be validated.

To be continued tomorrow with the spiritual perspective. There is the other side of this thing where God’s future awaits.

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